#HomeCrazzyHome is full of…
Would You Rathers….
Every day there are dozens of them.
During the US elections last year it was…
Would you rather live in the house with Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton?
Then it became…
Would you rather live in a house with Donald Trump and all he ever wore was a hot pink Speedo…or would you rather live with Hillary Clinton in a bikini?
They are often designed to hit my worst fears…
Would you rather do the water slide at the leisure center or the pony ride at LegoLand?
Would you rather be a fly for the rest of your life…or live under ground?
Knowing my love for homemaking there is this one…
Would you rather be able to cook and not clean or clean but not cook?
The only ones that I refuse to answer are the ones trying to make me choose between the people I love like…
Would you rather me be kidnapped or Cookie Monster?
I tell her that you don’t put that shit out into the universe. Karma…
The thing is…no matter what your answer. She is going to ask you…
Why did you choose that?
I have come to realize something…if you believe in the Theory of Mind as the best explanation for autism…and definitely not sure that I do…PanKwake is teaching herself it. Discovering how other people think.
I remember when we had speech and language therapy at home…way back in London. They pushed social stories as THE way to teach her how other people thought and felt. Those things bored her to tears. Even when we created our own using Elsa and other Disney characters. Forget it! Sure to kick off the demand avoidance.
Thing is…now I realize…that is not how she learns. She knows how she learns better than anyone else…and she teaches herself in her time. That though is tomorrow’s blog.
Yesterday, though, she had me in awe of those abilities.
Before we met Cookie Monster lived off of ready-meals. His wife was ill with the cancer for a very long time even before she died. Then living alone…even I HATED cooking for one. Besides the stories of his cooking abilities. Throwing flaming chicken out the back door. Or the time I left his food in the oven…all he had to do was turn it on and off. He burnt that one too.
So the first thing I wanted to do when I met this man was feed him. Not that I don’t love to feed anyone that gets even remotely close to #HomeCrazzyHome but Cookie most especially. The joke is that the worst punishment I could have would be to have to sit and watch him eat a ready-meal.
Now on top of this, Cookie went away with his Dad to a big train event at the beginning of the month. He was gone four days and three nights. It was the first time in over a year that we have been apart for very long.
So Little Miss Genius comes up with this one…
Would you rather Cookie eat ready meals in front of you for three days or be gone for three weeks?
I choose be gone. Putting on my Wonder Woman knickers and being brave…I coudl handle that (I think). So then it was…
Would you rather he eat ready-meals for THREE WHOLE YEARS or be gone for three MONTHS?
This time I choose ready meals. I explained that we barely survived for three days without him…how much I missed him. Three months…no way. He smiled and hugged me and agreed with my choice.
Do you see what she is doing? She is ferreting out the workings of my mind. Where are my lines? At what point does the balance of the scales tip from one to another choice?
That is a depth of Theory of the Mind that all the social stories in the world cannot come close to providing.
And she came up with the way of learning it…all by herself. All she needed to learn what she needs to know…was my cooperation. My time. My interest. And it has worked better than anything the ‘experts’ tried.
I am in total and complete awe of her her #BeautifullyAutisticMind.
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